“Becoming a witness of my body in decline while hiking up a mountain just makes me push harder towards the summit. Always pretend its Kilimanjaro”
“Music brings me back to life and dancing is "life" telling me it is happy” Headphones ON….The song on my CD after Neurologist appointments is “Oye mi amor” by MANA
I had returned to California for a purpose. When I lived in Mexico I missed the life I had left. And now I miss Mexico. I left my girls, or maybe they let go of me.
They believed in me therefore I could not let them down .
Left a dream I had made real. My coffee shop. Something that made me believe in myself.
And with all its struggles to start from scratch, this place was magical, for us and for our customers.
I think I created this place for my girls without even knowing it. They learned how to bake, cook, make espresso drinks and run a restaurant but most of all, work together.
Our menu was funky and made us different. We had Bagel Sandwiches, specialty espresso drinks, real cheesecakes and served no Coca-Cola, instead Ice Tea.
People had to get used to the fact that we were different, our concept of using one of a kind coffee cups with beautiful designs meant for us to change the person's mood with a cup. A beautiful cup. Cups I would select on my trips to LA.
We passed the test. Hung in there for a rollercoaster 1st year and after that, the rest was history.
May 2021 was our 21st anniversary.
A house built in the late 1800s, a space I made a drawing of 2 years prior and put it on my refrigerator to see everyday. Law of attraction? Definitely. This place was created to sit & unwind for hours, read and get away from the outside world, enjoy a cup of coffee, a dessert or maybe just listen to light jazz music echoing through the high ceiling covered dome. At the same time appreciating the architecture and history of the place. The antiques that adorned the patio, many of which friends also donated. It had a special vibe.
This became girls' livelihood to this day . Café Cultural “El Patio” in Leon, Guanajuato Mexico Established in May, 2000.
Around this time I recall I had started to have issues with my digestive system, constipation. I was also a Spin instructor and needed that extra energy to work all day and teach 6am classes which I loved. I did yoga, I was everywhere. I think of taking energy pills, red bull, shots of espresso and wonder if I caused a short circuit somewhere. Sleep deprivation? What I do know now is that Parkinson's Disease may start in the gut.
Research shows proteins thought to play a key role in the disease can spread from the gastrointestinal tract to the brain. Points that way for me. Others may be pesticide related.
Still no way to prevent it. No cure
*So just to let you know... I will be taking you on a bunch of detours but eventually bringing you to the final destination. ( The point of my story ).
Its like the movies that take you to the future then to the past and get you all confused.
Same!
Okay now I'm going to...
2008 then 2004
I knew Living back in California was to start all over.
I went to live in Mexico right after my girls were born. And stayed 18 years to be exact. So even fluently speaking English took time. Taking out my dusty English dictionary from my brain so I could carry on conversations made me think twice on how I wanted to say things. I decided back then I would make up some words and hopefully no one would notice. This way I could blend into the conversations with customers. Ha-ha!! Yeah ! I know, this made me either look stupid or very unique. I went for it. Being Me!
Trying to convert Spanish back into English when it took me so long to perfect my native language makes me think I may have confused my brain a bit , or just maybe, I already had begun to have symptoms.
I always believed in natural healing, herbs, naturopathic medicine, healers etc.
Mexico is very rich in folk medicine therefore I never really needed to see a doctor except my dentist. I realized I was not always dwelling on what hurt or pain, I would pretty much heal with teas, juicing, herbs, massages and like magic everything would go away. I believed.
.
Along with herbology there was a time in my life where I found an affinity for bees and all that evolves them. After having studied herbology with shamans and healers in Cuernavaca, Mexico I combined both by making my own herbal honeys and tonics. This was very spiritual time where I felt grounded and connected with nature. With the universe. With my purpose. To heal others.
2004, My father died during this time of colon cancer. In this terrible time of my life I somehow found emotional strength. 6 months before he died he wanted me to be at his bed side and said not to leave him until he was in a hospital so I stayed at the hospital. I was the assigned one, the chosen one, he would say. I was fortunate to share that time with him.
When he was ill he allowed me to do Reiki, give him oxygen drops (bio-oxidative therapy) and Essiac Tea. Brought him a big book of the human body and made him aware of where to visualize his fight with cancer (Simonton method). I was nobody medically but I was his daughter trying everything to save him.
I remember the day I was looking for oxygen drops. I ended up at Whole Foods all the way in West Hollywood (from Boyle heights). Dad had given me money to buy some things for myself and had leftover change so I decided to look for these remedies. I finally found what I needed. I was so excited and got in line. The young man rings me up and says $85.50, I open my hand carefully, I knew I was not going to have enough.
I look at him. Impotent and without either of us saying a word to each other he turns his light on for a manager's assistance and yells out “coupon”. I didn't have one. After the approval, the total was $70 ( Exactly what I had in my hand). When I thanked him I knew he sensed the gratitude I felt all the way from my heart. He smiled . To this day, I'm pretty sure God had something to do with it.
History of Colon Cancer in a first degree relative makes me an increased risk. Great!! Anything else?
I need to share some of my past in order to bring you into where I am now.
It would be no fun to just get to the point. Right?. Haha!
It has become difficult to tell a story. In my mind I have a clear idea and description of what I would like to say but when I am ready to speak all of my words are trying to cram out of my mouth at the same time and I make no sense. Then, when they're out I'm trying to sort my phrases, sentences accordingly. I lose my breath when I'm excited, so writing/journaling has been very comforting. It always has been. Now it's typing because my writing is horrible as of this year. After having beautiful handwriting I can no longer understand my own penmanship.
Parkinson's Sucks!!!
I hate to see how I loose a little something each day.
Actually I try not see it but Ill make a note of it.
Ill put my song on and go on a walk/hike, read, draw, exercise, clean, cook. And respect what I have.
My mind is constantly wanting me to do things and can't keep up at times but it has not kept me from trying. -Eva
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